After the Funeral

I decided to do a blog finally. It was after attending my grandfather's funeral (the second one we have lost in the last five months), that I decided I need to keep up with family more. Some of the talks at this funeral really got me thinking about some important topics. It was mentioned several times how much my grandfather loves my grandmother and how well he took care of her. It made me think about love, marraige, commitment, and what all that means.

I used to think that love meant that you would do anything for that person. I have now come to realize that is not the case. I mean, if my husband told me that we can no longer be LDS and wanted us to get a snake (which he would never do), I would not do it, no matter how much I love him. It's not that you have everything in common or that you both are physically attracted to each other. In the long scheme of things, it boils down to this. When you are deciding if you love someone, ask yourself one not-so-simple question, "Can I take care of this person for the rest of our lives on earth and for eternity?" Can you picture yourself taking care of this person if they got in a car crash, had cancer, or alzheimer's and didn't even remember who you are? Can you imagine yourself cleaning up their vomit, feces, or urine if they got sick? Can you picture yourself feeding them three times a day because they can't feed themselves? Can you picture all of this and still say you love them? What if they are suffering depression and become aloof? What if they lost their job and your bills are starting to pile up with no hopes in sight? Because it is easy to say that you can when you are staring at them when they are in their peak, they are smiling at you, loving words are being said. But what if some day, all you get is a blank stare when you stroke their cheek tenderly?

I believe that the words in most traditional wedding services are not taken seriously, "through sickness and health, for richer for poorer." I believe that a lot of divorces would not happen if we can ask ourselves this question, not just before we get married, but constantly throughout our marriage. My grandfather was the epitome of love. Through his actions of taking care of my grandmother for 25 years with endless devotion, he has inspired us all. I looked at my husband as we were driving home and asked myself those questions. I decided to marry him, and through that decision promised to take care of him no matter what. I am in charge of him and he is in charge of me. I know that he would do exactly what my grandfather did if I was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and I would do the same for him. That, my friends, is what is called the true love of Christ.